Wax on...Wax off!!!

So I got this daring, random idea to try waxing the other day....what the heck was i thinking? Alright, this whole situation was a nightmare to begin with! I decided to have Jason help with the whole thing..i thought that one, it would be a good bonding experience...and two i couldn't bear to pull the wax off myself...so that was his job. We put Brayden to bed and i prepped myself for the pain...actually i thought it wouldn't be so bad..and i don't really think it would have been if it had gone as planned. So, I microwave the wax and we start...not so bad the first couple of strips...then Jason decides the wax isn't hot enough anymore so we heat it up again. Well while doing this the microwave dies. What! It is brand new! They just replaced it a month ago! That matter is a whole other blog that i will get to...So the microwave magically starts working again after trying everything...testing the breakers..not it...short in the plug...not it...nothing is working... and then all of a sudden it turns back on..what the heck! Anyway...so we resume the waxing again. Then the cloth strips decide they don't want to adhere to the wax and they start pulling off while the wax stays on...this keeps happening...so now, I am left with strips of wax stuck to me and they are dry...how do i get them off? We tried everything! just pulling the wax off...doesn't work so great...paper instead of the cloth..nope..and in a last ditch effort...Jason tried superglue on top of the wax and then the cloth....not even that worked! By this time...i am tired...and yes getting ornery and frustrated that my little experiment is not working at all! So finally, I get the wax off by using a box cutter/razor blade and scraping it off ever so carefully so i didn't scrape skin off to. While this worked it was so painful because instead of taking the hair off in one rip it was pulling it off one hair at a time! Oh it hurt! By the end of the ordeal i was done...put me to bed...i was bleeding...had welts and was hurting! Needless to say...i will not be trying waxing again anytime soon! Although it wasn't Jason's fault it didn't work...sorry honey...but you're not helping next time...well maybe you will be...but only in the form of financing the operation..shoot..if i am doing that again i am getting it done professionally!